{"id":409,"date":"2015-04-23T23:29:27","date_gmt":"2015-04-23T23:29:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/eatingforrealblog.wordpress.com\/?p=409"},"modified":"2015-04-23T23:29:27","modified_gmt":"2015-04-23T23:29:27","slug":"i-am-made-for-more","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/?p=409","title":{"rendered":"I am made for MORE"},"content":{"rendered":"

NOONE SHOULD STRUGGLE FROM AN EATING DISORDER OR GO THROUGH RECOVERY ALONE<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I AM NOT ALONE<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am not alone anymore\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I remember being<\/p>\n

Afraid and Uncertain<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Vulnerable and Na\u00efve<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Unacceptable and Unworthy<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

If I could only change<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

My life would be perfect<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

This disease came in<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Taking over everything<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Sneaky and deceiving<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

If only I could lose weight<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Secret to make me special<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The answer to everything<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Isolating from life<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Protecting my secret<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Lonely, searching for friends<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

But not needing anyone<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I thought I was in control<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

My control controlled me<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Never realizing HOW sick<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Plagued with denial<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Succeeded at weight loss<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Lost so much more<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Secrets to protect the disease<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Could not love<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

With so much self-hate<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Not trusting<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Controlled by the secrets<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The thoughts never stopping<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I just needed to keep going<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

If I did not have an eating disorder<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Life was not worth living<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I could not get recover<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I was a failure<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I gave up<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I had no purpose<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I was losing the fight<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I was too sick<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I could not fight anymore<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I needed help to live<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I found Hope in the Lord<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Those he sent to help<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He was waiting for me<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I took that leap of faith<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

It was not easy<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Recovery was hard<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Reaching out saying help me<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I cannot do this alone<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I learned to trust<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am not the same anymore<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I said I am ready to let go<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Of hurts holding me down<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He lifted me up to see<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Life is better when set free<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Not needing to prove<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am special and worthy<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I was made for more<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Take a bite and see<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I can live my dreams<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Discover my purpose<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Life began to have sunshine<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

No longer darkness<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Recovery takes work<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I had to trust and let go<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I had to accept the truth<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Others were showing me<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Slowly I healed physically<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I accepted that I am loved<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I was able to love<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am set free<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am worthy of Grace<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Not an eating disorder<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He already knew my pain<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He wants to wipe it away<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Lord, I want to trust you<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He said let me carry you<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I do not have to worry<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He suffered for me<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am not alone<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

My slate is wiped clean<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I need to be healthy<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

To use my purpose<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

He said you are not alone<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

All suffering<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Will reveal His Glory<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I will not be deceived again<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I will trust in the Lord<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I am not alone<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

NOONE SHOULD STRUGGLE FROM AN EATING DISORDER OR GO THROUGH RECOVERY ALONE I AM NOT ALONE I am not alone anymore\u00a0 I remember being Afraid and Uncertain Vulnerable and Na\u00efve Unacceptable and Unworthy If I could only change My life would be perfect This disease came in Taking over everything Sneaky and deceiving If only […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-409","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/409","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=409"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/409\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=409"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=409"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopeinthemess.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=409"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}